July 03, 2019
Trump Would Lead the Parade Himself…

… if it weren’t for those darned old bone spurs. This from Tony Piel, formerly with the U.S. Second and Fourth Armored (Tank) Divisions:
Like other Dictators, US President Donald Trump has announced that he has decided to hold a military extravaganza parade in Washington D.C. on the Fourth of July 2019 to show off U.S. military power (and thus to celebrate himself as “Dear Leader” of our country). It will include a fly-over by military aircraft (including his own “Air Force One)” as well the use of U.S' Army tanks, missiles and other weaponry.

You will be pleased to hear that Trump’s proposal includes showing off the latest shiny, “brand new Sherman tanks” (his words, not mine) as evidence of the latest in US military technology and proof of US military supremacy under his (Trump’s) leadership.

There's a hitch: We haven’t made Sherman tanks since World War II in the 1940s. Trump can perhaps be forgiven for this gaffe. For two reasons:

(1) Trump performed notoriously poorly in history courses in primary and secondary schools (a White House secret). Now, is ignorance of history a valid excuse ? (It did not deter acceptance for higher education, but that was thanks to endowment contributions from Daddy Fred Trump.)

(2) Trump was a draft dodger who paid for a fake medical deferment during the Vietnam War. (Well, “Who wants to die in a swamp ? “ Anyway, it didn’t deter him from playing golf.) So, how can President Trump be blamed for ignorance of such archaic military details ?

The cost of Trump’s extravaganza (to honor himself and frighten other nations) is estimated to cost some $100 million over and above the usual cost of conventional Fourth of July celebrations in Washington D.C. (This is somewhat higher than the cost of children’s soap, toothpaste, blankets and soccer balls. Presumably, Trump takes showers, eats well, and sleeps in a well-feathered bed, but he never played soccer. So, how would he know — or care ?). But wait ’til you see those “new” Shermans. (Realizing his gaffe, Trump is probably looking for some antiques right now.)

Webding3.jpg

Posted by Jerome Doolittle at July 03, 2019 01:31 PM
Email this entry to:


Your email address:


Message (optional):


Comments

Right on.

Posted by: Cindy Kirk on July 3, 2019 6:13 PM

God rained on his parade today. I take that as a good omen.

Yours crankily,
The New York Crank

Posted by: TheNewYorkCrank on July 4, 2019 11:38 PM
Post a comment
Name:


Email Address:


URL:


Comments:


Remember info?