March 30, 2014
Stuffing Socks in Their Jocks

Can there anything more pathetic than a grown “man” who would pay thousands of dollars to shoot a tame deer bred to have great, bulging deformed antlers?

(Now that I think of it, maybe there is. Back in the day in Laos, I worked for an American ambassador who would strap on his six-shooter when he went upcountry to our CIA base near the Plain of Jars, safely surrounded by spooks and our Hmong guerrillas. His own generation’s war was World War II, which he had sat out at our embassy in Switzerland.)


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Posted by Jerome Doolittle at March 30, 2014 11:40 AM
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Looks like the deer won't have to stuff his jock. Aren't those testicles growing on his antler?

Posted by: Lou Garou on March 30, 2014 5:14 PM

Nevermind the deer. I'm waiting for the dictator of some impoverished, overpopulated Third World republic to realize that his nation's most profitable profit can be its people. He will then make an offer to rich American hunters to visit his country and, for a very, very large fee, to hunt some of the citizens down and kill them. (Bringing home the heads mounted on a plaque is optional, but of course involves dditional fees.)

Of course, there would have to be some justification. The hapless citizens would be labeled "criminals," or "terrorists," or even "political radicals."

For an extra $100,000, you might even be able to capture them, or take already captured "criminals" and execute them. Your choice of means, of course.

Yours crankily,
The New York Crank

Posted by: New York Crank on March 31, 2014 3:48 PM

Not to be forgotten is the deer hunters in places like South Carolina that will shoot dogs that stray onto "their" deer hunting property (some just have hunting rights). If it just happens to be somebody's pet dog, too bad is how they see it. The dogs are out their scaring off "their" deer". So they shoot them. I've heard them justify it to themselves and trying damn hard to convince others, some of them who agreed it was necessary to protect "their" land and "their" deer. Despite the fact that those are free roaming deer and nobody owns them. They'll kill a pet dog to protect the possibility of maybe shooting a deer. I don't hunt and I don't tag along so I've never seen it. But I've heard the talk at country stores. A good while back.

Posted by: BP on April 3, 2014 2:34 AM
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