November 16, 2013
Is This a Great Country or What?
From the New York Times:
JACKSBORO, Tenn. — In a mix of old-time religion, modern media and Tennessee law, a 22-year-old preacher who has become a reality television star because of his experience in handling poisonous snakes pleaded not guilty on Friday to illegally keeping dozens of them that he and his congregants routinely touch during worship services…
“This ain’t no longer just a fight for snake handling,” Mr. Hamblin, the father of five, told a group of supporters wearing red — to symbolize the blood of Christ — before his arraignment on a misdemeanor wildlife possession charge. “This is a fight for freedom of religion…”
“If they take him to jail, I’ll go to jail with him,” said Bucky Rouse, a former embalmer who is now an interior designer. “This is something we believe in.”
Posted by Jerome Doolittle at November 16, 2013 10:45 AM
I would think that any competent snake researcher would by now have overcome his distaste for anything but atheism and attended one of those services to find out if the snakes are being kept and handled in accordance with PETA guidelines, or at least in a manner that respects the snakes proper place in history. After all, that Apple that the snake marketed so well was Adam's downfall.
And of course, subconsciously the serious snake researcher would have to have great respect for the computer that the snake was responsible for by doing what butterflies in Africa do to create hurricanes, which is spawning the chain of events that led one evil capitalist to give the snake's favorite computer its rightful place in history, as we are finding out now by the NSA revelations, as the fruit of that poisonous tree. In fact, the snake was responsible for creating so many memes that are imbedded within our society, such as Supreme Court opinions on that poisonous tree doctrine that once were given proper respect until a bunch of faux Bible thumpers got on the Court and ruined that poisonous tree doctrine, thereby creating the American Gulag Archipeligo. Even Satan couldn't have thought up such a diabolical plot as that ingenious reptile.
So when is your next trip to Tennessee Jerry?
Freedom of religion is it? Well, then, I think I shall become something Ancient Viking-ish and defend my right to pillage and plunder and offer up human sacrifice….cause I've got this little list (possibly swiped from Santa) of folks who have been naughty.