March 13, 2012
We're Doing This Wrong...

Ohio state legislator Nina Turner has decided to dramatize the War On Women: Contraceptive Theater of Operations by attempting to place an equivalent burden on men:

...the Democrat has become the latest in a series of female state legislators to give her male colleagues a taste of their own medicine by introducing a bill that limits men’s ability to get a Viagra prescription without meeting certain government conditions.

Not bad. But I suggest we think in different terms. This is a calculated burden on a settled issue of the rights of American citizens. I modestly propose we burden another settled right, to dramatize that fact. Therefore, no one should be allowed to purchase a firearm in this country without being required to watch a 30-minute montage of coroner’s photos of children who have been killed by firearms in this country. The montage’s soundtrack should include “Tears in Heaven” by Eric Clapton and “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion. Remaining music should be left up to the states, in acknowledgment of the Tenth Amendment.

Undoubtedly we will hear that this violates the Second Amendment. But since it doesn’t actually prevent anyone from acquiring the means to slaughter additional children, that argument should be easily countered.


Posted by Kurt Weldon at March 13, 2012 01:43 PM
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Not far enough Kurt. I propose that the soundtrack be piped into the bone structure of the firearm buyer by a speaker device that must be inserted into the anus of the gun buyer for him to be able to hear it by placing the sound device directly onto the prostate of the gun buyer. That would create the equivalence necessary to create an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth and penetration for penetration equivalence.

Posted by: Buck on March 13, 2012 2:51 PM

Buck, I'm liking the way you think....

Posted by: Kurt Weldon on March 13, 2012 3:52 PM

". . . required to watch a 30-minute montage of coroner’s photos . . ."

What's wrong with a weekend seminar?

Posted by: Phil on March 13, 2012 7:20 PM
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