June 23, 2010
Identifying Anuses

There are certain things that mark a man as an asshole, so that the prudent citizen can no longer place full confidence in him. Or her, but let’s’ stick with the stupider sex right now.

For instance, any politician who wears a cowboy hat in public is incontestably an asshole, not to be entrusted with enterprises great or small. Take Dick Armey. Take George W. Bush. Take Ken Salazar. But why go on. The thing is obvious.

For another instance, suspicion must surround a man who challenges subordinates to contests of strength. It is for this reason that the halo around General Petraeus’s head is misplaced, and that the choice of him to command Obama’s Folly in Afghanistan is a poor one.

Read this, and reflect on the options facing the private challenged to a push-up contest by his commanding general. Ask yourself what “brawny” 19-year-old private fresh out of basic can only do 25 pushups? I don’t know if the kid could do more than Petraeus, but I know he’s a hell of an actor. Of course all he had to fool was a two-star general and a Times reporter.

For infomation on the peculiar photo below, go here, and here.



Posted by Jerome Doolittle at June 23, 2010 02:43 PM
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Yeah, well I used to run too when I was a young college student in 10K races and occasional 15 mile races when there was such a thing other than runs measured in meters or kilometers. I never did the Marathon thing though, my knee gave out before I tried to go that far in one running. But 6 or 8 miles 5 and 6 times a week with occasional longer runs on the weekends was normal.

But it didn't make me a better person other than understand that one could endure more pain than one thought he could if he kept pushing himself to go farther and faster. Except what I got from reading George Sheehan who realized at the very end how running interfered with his family life and all the years running caused him to ignore his many children.

Now with an arthritic back that's going to keep me from running again without the skills of a good surgeon there's one thing I don't do very often, actually never these last few years unless you count the 6 beers I drank a a baseball game a year or so go, that the General seems to have a habit of doing is going out with the boys and getting shit faced drunk and putting on a spectacle. Not that I haven't done it later in my life more than I care to mention. A Supreme Court justice who was admired by many, feared for his ability to cut down the unprepared and loved by those who he later took aside and gave a little story about someone having to be made an example every now and then that made you understand why he did that and even like him afterwards, the story he told about drinking was that if you were going to do it, you better get your ass out of your territory and stay of of the newspapers even then (this was before DUI's made that a little harder than it is now and when drinking was still in fashion).

Well, what does this idiot General do? He goes to the what is now arguably still the diplomatic capital of the world and gets shit faced drunk along with those under him of all people and not only that, in front of a reporter looking for a real interesting story. Anybody can read books, but it takes wisdom to stay out of the newspapers such that you don't make almost everyone hate you and McCrystal seems to have gotten drunk one too many times in the wrong place at the wrong time. And he got caught at it. With all that running, I wonder how he fueled himself. Runners need carbs for the glycogen needed by their muscles to fuel their runs and alcohol is pure carbs. It always interfered with my runs but I read many stories about runners who used alcohol for carbo loading and didn't suffer the ill effects in their runs such as I did, so much it kept me from drinking during my serious running years. But I've heard of other runners who thrived on liquid meals of alcohol. I wouldn't be surprised at all though if his fuel for the other meals he'd absolutely need to run as much as the article said he did is a steady diet of liquid carbs. In fact, this guy might just be one drunk general who got away with hiding it for many years. It would explain the long runs and the one meal a day. Serious running burns seruiys calories, your metabolism gets pumped up for a good part of he day, and you have to get them from somewhere and body fat is the worst place to get them, especially at the end of a Marathon where when you do that they call it "hitting the wall". . Liquid Carbohydrates are the quickest and easiest way to fuel those muscles. So maybe the guy was a drunk. I don't know one way or the other but I can't figure out any other way he could run that much and live on one meal a day unless the rest was liquid carbs that turn into the glycogen needed for muscle fuel for runners. And the signs point to alcohol as possibly the source. I don't know, I'm speculating here but it makes sense to me. I wonder how many more like him there are within the ranks.

Posted by: Buck on June 23, 2010 8:19 PM

The plural of anus is ani, not anuses.

Posted by: Nugatory on June 23, 2010 8:31 PM

Glad to join the few, the proud, the ani. Not sure if I'm there yet but sometimes its enjoyable making a serious stab at it. You can drink to that General.

Posted by: Buck on June 23, 2010 8:43 PM

Good catch, Noog, and one that could only have been made by a total. . . . Aw, forget it. Incidentally, how's that Asberger's of yours coming along?

Posted by: Fast Eddie on June 23, 2010 9:03 PM

It is quite a coincidence that Petraus and McCrystal both eat only a single meal a day, isn't it? Must be something in the water in the military or something. Compare and contrast if you can. There's weird stuff out there about these hooligans.



Posted by: Buck on June 23, 2010 9:07 PM

Thanks for your concern, Eddie. And incidentally it's spelled Asperger's.

Posted by: Nugatory on June 24, 2010 4:46 PM
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