Dr. Bucephalus Fager, director of the FDA’s Pet Food Division today announced that a FULL RECALL has been announced for all PET FOODS manufactured or sold in the United States since January 20, 2001. Dr. Fager, a graduate of the Hooterville School of Animal Husbandry was quoted in the Washington Picayune; “studies of the effects of contaminants on pet food never has been a priority of the Administration. We are approaching this situation in the same manner and with the same concern that President Bush has shown for Hurricane Katrina victims.”
At press time it was reported that Cargill is lobbying hard for a government contract to ensure that pet owners’ applications for steak rations would be put on the fast track for government approval. Officials from Cargill cite the success of the administration’s Medicare prescription drug bill as a model for ensuring the timely passage of a bill necessary to ensure that pet owners are able to obtain the finest and most expensive cuts of beef for their pets in an efficient and orderly fashion, in keeping with the needs of industry profits.
Neo-Cons do Religion. Neo-Cons don't do Government.
Posted by: Hoffmann on April 2, 2007 5:48 AMWe've reached the point where every day is April Fools. These guys are beyond parody, beyond satire.
Posted by: Furber on April 2, 2007 10:28 AMSatire, indeed. How'd you like to be named after Alexander's horse? I mean, with parents who'll name a kid Bucephalus, it's no wonder the Republicans get mean early in life.
Posted by: Chuck Dupree (Belisarius) on April 2, 2007 10:44 PMDr. Fager thanks you for that observation. Seems to me to be an entirely appropriate name for a guy in charge of the nation's pet food. Rep[ublicans have no problem eating their own. But watch that Cargill meat, willya'?
Indeed. Perhaps I should have checked the calendar... ;-[
Posted by: Chuck Dupree (Belisarius) on April 3, 2007 10:39 PM